I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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