yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
