How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
