did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
where does the pee come out of this thing
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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