i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
