I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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