You're completely useless in the revolution.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
