Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
