I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
