i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
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