I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
she pinky promised me she was 18
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
