fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
