So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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