You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
