You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Sext me about skeletons
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
