i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Randomize
