Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Just cropdusted the office
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
