I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
