I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
