belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I feel like abortions should bother me more
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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