Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
My bed smells like the plague
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
