OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
