If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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