I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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