I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
