Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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