Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
farters have to be the big spoon...
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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