I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
When are your genitals available?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
