She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
