your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So drunk its hurt
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
