names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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