Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize