i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
