So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
