I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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