You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
