actually, I'm a sock model
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
