But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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