Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
it's like iHOP with fire
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
