he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
