just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
We are all done wearing pants today
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
