Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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