think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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