Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
