Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize