I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
