Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
