i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
