guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize