Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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